So here are three key facts:
For the last few months, I have realised that I have been hiding in my clothes. I have been wearing grey and black clothes and let's be honest, pretty baggy out of shape dull clothes.
I also couldn't connect with the clothes that I owned and have been really puzzled over this feeling of having lost my style but not knowing what that style was. As clothes are such a big external part of our personality, I was hiding in my grey and black clothes.
This last two years have been huge in my life and I can really reflect as I approach my 42nd birthday in a few days time. The week after I turned 40 I was made redundant from a company I loved working for at a time when I was suffering from severe depression. It is only now I have really had my aha moment that I haven't been able to wear any of the clothes I wore in those 18 months leading up to that point since. I connected those clothes unconsciously to a different Sophie. I put on weight so I couldn't wear those clothes and I had wardrobes full of clothes that reminded me of a different person - a person I felt had failed. It is only now I can look back on myself with compassion and accept my illness and the things that happened during that time.
And here I am now - a different person. Trying to Live the Solution and Not the Problem (as my coach Julie has challenged me to do). I also know the answers are within me. I had started looking outside of myself to find help (and the answer) - maybe a personal shopper would help, maybe a professional to help me look at my wardrobe - but then it came to me. I knew the answer. I know what suits my body shape (being an avid fan of Trinny and Susannah!) and more importantly, I can let go of my past and the clothes that represent that.
It is time to live now - with the Sophie who has been on a huge journey and is now here. To wear colour and accessories, to wear beautiful fabrics, to enjoy clothes and to build a style that is me now.
So what have I done to make this happen? I packed away all my old clothes. Maybe one day I will invite them back into my life. I have also shopped. I have bought clothes with colour (Kettlewell colours is a fabulous place online for this), clothes with beautiful pattens, dresses to celebrate my body and have started again living in the now.
I had no idea how stuck I was in the past and this isn't where I want to be living.
On a journey to live the best sparkling life possible. Brit living in Denmark, mum to two amazing little people, Navy girlfriend, jazz lover, exploring yoga, buddhism and living healthy.